英语笑话本站共收录英语笑话129篇

Watch out for themselves

farmerjonespickedabigredappleandhandedittotheboysaying,"watchoutforworms.""whenieatapples,"repliedtheboy,"thewormshavetowatchoutforthemselves. ...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:25:03 赞(2) 阅读(654)

Worries about mad cow disease

therewerethesetwocows,chattingoverthefencebetweentheirfields.thefirstcowsaid,"itellyou,thismad-cow-diseaseisreallyprettyscary.theysayitisspreadingfast;iheardithitsomecowsdownonthejohnsonfarm."theothercowreplies,"iain‘tworried,itdon‘taffectusducks." ...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:57:40 赞(10) 阅读(555)

Sooner or later

athiefwithalongrecordwasbroughtbeforethejudge.judge:haveyoueverstolenthings?thief:oh,nowandthen.judge:andwherehaveyoustolenthesethings?thief:oh,hereandthere.judge:right.lockhimup,officer.thief:hey,whendoigetoutjail?judge:oh,soonerorlater. ...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:58:43 赞(81) 阅读(680)

New chemical warfare

aninstructorinchemicalwarfareaskedsoldiersinhisclass:"anyoneknowstheformulaforwater?""sure.that‘seasy,"saidoneman."whatisit?""h,i,j,k,l,m,n,o.""what,what?"reaskedtheinstructor."htoo,"explainedthechemistryexpert. ...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:54:36 赞(56) 阅读(473)

Pass out in shock

themanpassedoutinadeadfaintashecameoutofhisfrontdoorontotheporch.someonedialed911.whentheparamedicsarrived,theyhelpedhimregainconsciousnessandaskedifheknewwhatcausedhimtofaint."itwasenoughtomakeanybodyfaint,"hesaid."mysonaskedmeforthekeystothegarage,...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:57:35 赞(54) 阅读(462)

Jokes About Death

oldteachersneverdie,theyjustlosetheirclassoldtelephonesneverdie,theyjuststopringingoldthermodynamicistsneverdie,theyjustachievetheirstate--ofmaximumentropyoldtiretubesneverdie,theyjustgetpuncturedoldtrashneverdies,theyjustburyitoldtrigonometryteacher...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:56:14 赞(32) 阅读(562)

A game of animal football

theanimalswerebored.finally,thelionhadanidea."iknowareallyexcitinggamethatthehumansplaycalledfootball.i‘veseenitont.v."heproceededtodescribeittotherestoftheanimalsandtheyallgotexcitedaboutitsotheydecidedtoplay.theywentouttothefieldandchoseupteamsandw...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:55:09 赞(26) 阅读(500)

A special football match

mikewaslateforschool.hesaidtohisteacher,mr.brack,"excusemeformycominglate,sir.iwatchedafootballmatchinmydream.""whydiditmakeyoulate?"inquiredtheteacher."becauseneitherteamcouldwinthegame,soitlastedalongtime."repliedmike. ...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:51:12 赞(97) 阅读(506)

An opponent lost his head

whilemakingalong,dullspeech,apoliticianreceivedagreatdealofhecklingfromthegallery.secondly,someonethrewacabbageontothestage."ladiesandgentlemen,"saidthepolitician,"iseethatoneofmyopponentshaslosthishead." ...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:36:50 赞(13) 阅读(428)

Choose a punishment

privateloydswasbroughtupbeforetheunitcoforsomeoffence."youcantakeyourchoice,private-onemonth‘srestrictionortwentyday‘spay,"saidtheofficer."allright,sir,"saidthebrightsoldier,"i‘lltakethemoney." ...

英语笑话 2021-12-28 17:59:23 赞(10) 阅读(532)

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